All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
This toilet bowl is my home.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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