WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
