Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
