Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize