At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
This baby is an asshole
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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