Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
me + whiskey = a bad person
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
