well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Randomize
