This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
