Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
