the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize