Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
