is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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