She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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