I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
She tied me up with her honor cords...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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