You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
