He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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