Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
you never un-have a 4some
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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