i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
