He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
it glows. i had to have it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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