and she was petting her beer can
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
