Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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