her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
