His pubic hair was longer than his dick
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize