i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
