I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize