Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
