so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
