But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
