The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize