she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
