So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
This house was built for laser tag.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I need to align my fucking chakras
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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