Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
