Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
