He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Oh god it's open bar.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
