I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
