My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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