This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I looked at my own cervix.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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