Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
