no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
