She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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