i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I have already put on my inside pants.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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