You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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