i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
