To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Randomize