They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
