8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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