You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
