Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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