Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
