I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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